440. Discard the card.

For reasons I'm not going to discuss here, I strongly dislike credit card companies. I will never "own" another credit card as long as I live.

I get about a half a dozen offers from credit card companies a week. As soon as they are in my hot little hands, they go immediately into the shredder. (Ewww... Did you just get a mental image of the foliage shredder Fargo scene, too? Yuck, and I'm sorry.)

The open-me tactics printed on the offers' envelopes often amuse me:

1) Bribery: 15 Gazillion Award Miles!
As if I'll be able to afford to travel if I get saddled down with credit card debt.

2) Sweet talk: Business owners like you are special.
Duh!

3) Appeals to the business owner's business sense: We save you time AND money!
Yeah, credit card companies are known for their altruism.

There are other tactics, but I think they show their true colors when they employ this method:

4) Would I be guilty of exaggeration if I called this method "coercion"?
5) Implied coercion, then?

Do not discard?! Signature Required?!

Hm.

Satisfaction washed over me when I heard my paper shredder devouring this special offer.

.